Past will follow you everywhere

At Monday I was getting sick. It was maybe food poisoning. I don't have the symptoms anymore since Tuesday morning. But I still feel sick. My belly don't feel well and I feel energyless. In that time I used unbelievable much mobile internet data's. Also because I was looking a movie over Netflix. And that one makes me realize, that I don't do what I should do since I am here.
I am so hard working to get as much work as possible, so that I don't have to much time to think about something.
The movie touches me more, than I thought it will be and I realized, that I mainly should be here, to concentrate on myselfe. And not to take care of dogs and cats who are treated bad from the people in this village and also not mainly to teache children English.
But I also realized through this movie, that I do that, because I don't want to get in touch to intensive with everything inside me. I have known that already before I was coming here. Because I always break down in cry if I whatch movies which only touches one of the problematic topics from my past.
And then I am often not able to calm down easily again so I realized early, that I didn't cry that much because of the movies themselves.
I cryed because there is something in my past and the movie let it coming out.
Because this is a travel blog, I think I don't will have much to write in this month here.
I will write more intensive on my blog about my past.
Everyone who wants to read that, could contact me and ask for the link.
Thanks.